super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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