bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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