Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Randomize
