True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I forget how to act sober
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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