marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
