Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
