Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
