I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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