why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
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