Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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