You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
