im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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