dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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