you traded sex for a burrito?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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