i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
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i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
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Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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