Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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