Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
