whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
