woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize