she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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