Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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