when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
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