somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
