you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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