Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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