i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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