Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
