To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
