I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
