There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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