worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
