If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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