I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
After last night, I could never be a politician.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
