belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
