I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
