Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
