Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
