Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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