I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
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