i just google imaged poop.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize