Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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