As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
