People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
