they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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