lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
ugly people sure do ruin things
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Randomize
