You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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