Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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