Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
