So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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