oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
